Would you date a person with physical disfigurement?

I know this sounds like a shallow question and I just need someone to back me up here.





I have always had the luck of dating women that are attractive and physically fit(sexy). But I since went out with someone that has some physical disfigurement, her right arm is thinner and her right hand twisted as well. she's a nice gal and I feel really comfortable with her but I don't think she feels comfortable with her right arm. I do try to hold it and kiss it but she sort of pulls away and give me the other hand instead.





Question:





Would it be wrong to date someone like her since, I have been dating attractive (what society thinks) women?





Would she feel pressured to date be because of my past?





Why would she pull away her disfigured arm?

Would you date a person with physical disfigurement?
shes prolly just not use to the attention, probably rejected most the time. and shy about her difigurement and no it is not wrong to date someone like that. they are just like any other person. i think that if u show her u really care about her and like her, she will feel more comfortable. give her time.
Reply:Very shallow.................however........w... does it matter what is different? If you like someone you like them. PERIOD. What if you were in love and married and she lost her entire arm and or leg? Would you leave? I think the fact your asking this dumb question is maybe because your to worried about what everyone else will say or think. It is your life, and I can't imagine her pain and feelings. But I hope that you go with your heart and not your brain here. I wish you the best of luck. You might just find out she is the best women you will ever meet.
Reply:dude, just ask her if she's comfortable with her arm and around you..
Reply:she's probablt just uncomfertable w. you touching her b/c she isn't used to it. don't make it a point to do it constantly, show her affrction in every way so that she feels loved and more comfertable period.


oh, and your previous dating history probably isn't an issue unless you make it one.
Reply:The reason why she pulls away is because she is not happy with her "issue" and feels embarrassed whenever you get close.





My advice:





If you are really into her and wish to take this further, then talk to her. Tell her how you feel. It sometimes takes time to adapt... so be patient.





---BTW----


Real beauty and Real feelings are deep inside the soul where disfigurements, color, size etc do not exist. We are all the same.
Reply:Ok first of all this isn't a shallow question, it is somewhat strange... but not shallow.





First of all is it wrong to date her? No, to hell with what society thinks, if you like her if you are comfortable around her what is right or wrong with her arm or anything else doesn't make a bit of difference.





Secondly why would she feel pressured? She shouldn't feel pressured at all.





She would pull it away because she is embarrassed by it and this is where you need to show her that you are a good guy, ignore her arm, and when she trusts you more and feels intimate and vulnerable with you about it, show her that she means something to you and that you don't give a damn about her arm.





Treat this one right bro and you may have found a mate for life. which is a wonderful thing to find - this girl has probably been ridiculed and outcast for this thing that isn't her fault, and if you show her you area good guy she will give you her loyalty and her love, and those things are worth more than anything else in this life.





Period.
Reply:It would not be wrong, as long as you are not "breaking the law" you can do whatever the hell you want.





No, if she is attracted enough to you.





Because she is self conscious about it, with enough time and comprehension she will realize she can be at ease with you.
Reply:yeah I would date someone with one, who cares?





she probably is insecure, just reassure her!
Reply:*no its not wrong.....if you like her thats all that counts





*yes she might because maibe she doesnt feel beautiful enough for you...make her feel safe and that shes the only girl for u





*It might be because shes embarased about it
Reply:no, if you feel confortiable with here then go for it,,, dont be shallow, and yes that is a verry shallow question.
Reply:it wouldn't be wrong for you to date her. She's a human just as us just different. it shouldn't be held against her. a lot of people are attractive but some aren't so lucky. She might not feel pressured maybe a little uncomfortable nothing time wouldn't heel. she prob. pulls her hand away b/c she thinks its a burden or a that it will change your mind about her. She could be a little embarrassed about it also. just talk things over with her and ask her how she feels with you ..good luck.
Reply:u should wanna date her due to her personality ....it seems like u hit things off with her.....also when ur in a relationship the past is the past ..ur supposed to b workin on a future....also when u have something that people look at u funny for or pitty u about u become ashamed of it ..it seems like she has a lit bit of confidence due to her arm...dood luck
Reply:Suppose that YOU had an atrophied arm. And suppose that you went out with a girl who kept talking about it all night long. The message that you'd be getting from her is: "You're all deformed, but I'm such a great person that I'm totally okay with that."





You should let her feel relaxed and respected, and then let HER decide to feel comfortable with her arm. Instead, you're trying to make her arm into a big issue, assuming that this will somehow make her feel comfortable and relaxed.





So basically, you're thinking about the situation in a reversed sort of way, and that's why there's a problem between the two of you.

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